The Benefits of Positive Parenting
Sometimes called positive discipline or loving guidance, positive parenting is parenting that resists the temptation to be punitive. It means offering positive discipline that keeps kids on the right path. It helps children learn responsibility and consideration, and makes for happier family units.
We know that reinforcing good behavior and reward systems produce better results than harsh discipline and punishments. It helps children feel good about their choices and strive to repeat them, rather than find ways to avoid a punishment. Children naturally seek the praise and acknowledgement of their caregivers, so we can use this tendency to steer their behavior.
Positive parenting does not mean a lack of discipline. To be a positive parent, you still have to acknowledge poor behavior and correct it, but you do it in a manner that encourage repetition of positive behavior, not avoidance of the punishment.
Positive parenting offers a number of benefits. Here are a few.
Better understanding of feelings
Positive parenting means sharing feelings openly. For example, if your child darts across the parking lot without looking, explain how nervous that makes you feel and how sad you would be if they were injured. Since your child doesn’t want to impart those feelings on you, they’ll likely follow your wishes without being punished. This creates a life-lasting pattern of empathy where your child learns to anticipate others feelings before acting.
Reduces power struggles
Harsh discipline can make children feel poorly about themselves. They internalize their bad behavior rather than correct it and continue to act out. Eventually your child will see you as an obstacle between them and happiness; power struggles will ensue. It’s important to set limits but due so with fairness and empathy. If you treat your children with cruelty, they grow up treating others (including yourself) in kind.
Children who are raised in an environment where they feel good about themselves and their family develop healthy self-esteem. They know that they are capable of excellence and can feel good about their accomplishments. Harsh punishments can instill a sense of shame and fear that cause them to make poor decisions or avoid making decisions at all.
Every person is motivated by different things, including children. When you discipline with punishments, your tools are limited. There are only so many ways to yell or things to take away. When you discipline positively, you can learn and isolate the things your child values and play to them. For example, if you know your child values his independence, you can reward him for good behavior by letting him do grown-up things by himself.
Positive parenting fosters healthy relationships between parents and children that’s based on excellence, accomplishments, and powerful memories. Parents set limits through loving guidance. This creates a circle of respect that reinforces itself. Eventually the parent won’t have to discipline at all, just offer guidance.
Positive parenting creates children who are motivated by excellence. They seek to behave well and achieve their goals for the sake of the accomplishment, not because they fear punishments. As adults, these children are able to self-monitor themselves and their results. They seek to perform well in all things because that is their reward.
Written by Dr. Nina Farzin, Inventor of oogiebear
Nina is a wife, mother and career professional who never intended to start her own business. When her children were newborns, she ached to ease the discomfort from dry, stubborn, crusty mucus (boogers)! As a doctor, she knew there were no safe solutions on the market to help her kids, so she invented oogiebear, a revolutionary booger removal tool that helps babies breathe easier.
Nina graduated Howard University where she earned her doctorate in Pharmacy (R.Ph, Pharm.D). She is a Registered Pharmacist in Washington DC, Maryland and New York. Nina and her family are fitness enthusiasts who enjoy outdoor activities and healthy eating.
For more information, please visit myoogie.com.
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